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Causes of Divorce

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❶Send your email To. Family counseling to understand and explain these effects should be something all families in a tough situation should consider.

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Another prominent cause of divorce is unreasonable expectations Oliver. Sometimes one partner will have lofty expectations for the marriage without his or her partner realizing it. Though love should be the overriding reason to get married, it seems, a lack of intimacy causes many couples to get divorced.

The romantic, maybe even infatuated love that married couples feel in the beginning of their marriages eventually subsides. It is natural, but how the partners deal with this decrease in sexual contact often decides how the future marriage will pan out Oliver.

Though common sense, equality in marriages is not often achieved. Each partner should feel equal in the marriage, and not dominated. Though it is delicate balance, it can be accomplished. Those who cannot achieve this often ask for a divorce, as they feel they are being shackled by his or her marriage instead of feeling a sense of joy and happiness from the relationship Oliver.

Alas, some people are not prepared for marriage. Many people rush to get married in a romantic frenzy without taking in the consequences of such an action Oliver. They could be unprepared in terms of financial stability, emotional stability, and mental stability. Surprisingly, the age group with the highest rate of divorce are people in their 20s Oliver.

So, when getting married, be sure that you feel that everything is set for the occasion. A sad fact about marriages is that with emotional, physical, and mental strain, abuse can follow.

This abuse does not have to refer to only physical abuse, but also emotional and psychological abuse Oliver. Abuse can come from both men and women, and should not be thought of only as an attack against women, however women are subject to most of the physical abuse that occurs.

As you can see, the cause of divorce is multifaceted. Though one issue might put enough pressure on a marriage for the couple to go for a divorce, commonly a combination of problems arise that lend to the couple pondering the end of their relationship. Through infidelity, money issues, a lack of communication, constant arguing, weight gain, unrealistic expectations, a lack of intimacy, a lack of equality, a lack of preparedness, and abuse, marriages are broken.

It is important for couples, therefore, to get counseling when any of these issues arise. The countries with the highest divorce rate. Is English your native language? What is your profession? Student Teacher Writer Other. Academic Assignment Writing an Essay. Writing a Research Paper. Writing Guides for Students Writing a Memoir 2. Creative Writing Guides Writing a Song 3. Some can argue that every child deals with divorce differently, which is true, but ultimately it is important for the counselors, teachers and parents to develop a relationship with the child that everyone can understand and learn to cope with the divorce whether they show signs of distress or not Connolly, Green This first idea helps support the claim of this paper.

Once they have made that connection with the child, it can become very beneficial for everyone involved.

When a couple gets divorced, in some cases there can be much issue with who should have primary custody of the child and when the other parent should be able to see the child. Some divorces can become very nasty over these issues, but what they are failing to realize is they are not hurting themselves, they are hurting their child.

Some parents feel that the other parent should have no contact with the child at all; wanting them to sign their rights away and just become a distant memory Brown It is important that a child feels close with both parents, even if they do not see one every day.

This can be achieved at a much better pace if both parents are cordial to each other rather than having conflict between them. Even if there is conflict and hard feelings between the parents, it is beneficial for the child if they do not show that around the child. After all, it is the child who is suffering the most and conflict between parents only causes greater stress for the child. The primary focus post-divorce is the needs and feelings of the child. There were many different studies discussed in this article, however the child adjustment measure SDQ , was the most important one.

The SDQ is a 25 item scale with five sub-scales: The first four sub-scales can be summed to give a total difficulties score, with higher scores indicating more problem behavior It is important to understand how the SDQ uses measurements of the child to determine the emotional and behavioral wellbeing of them The child should not feel as if they need to pick a side and should be able to talk to both parents about what they are feeling.

If that strong connection is developed between the child and both parents, as well as both of the parents getting along for the sake of the child, it is much easier for the child to cope with the divorce and be able to move on from it. The article by Joseph H. It also suggests that a strong parent-child relationship with both parents is most effective in helping the child cope Also, in the article by Bonnie Mackey and Wade C.

Mackey, it states that in some parts of the United States, the father is seen as optional, whereas in other parts of the United States the father is seen to be an essential part of the development of his child If both parents stand behind the child and help them every step of the way, the child might feel as if they can accomplish anything which is a very powerful feeling.

This second idea also helps support the claim of this paper. Also, with the parents being civil for the sake of their child, it makes the child feel closer to both of them and results in a more efficient recovery from the divorce.

Before and After Divorce. A child has their peers to talk to as well as their teachers and school counselors while they are at school. They are talking to someone their age and they can give each other advice on how they each cope with their feelings and possibly even suggest to each other new ways to cope.

In addition to school life, there is also a program designed for parents and children going through a divorce. It also talks about how the MPP helps parents turn around how they can sometimes criticize, anger, or even withdraw from their child without meaning to. It helps the parents reconnect with their child and help them listen to the child and help them cope with the divorce mentally and emotionally Altmaier, Maloney Altmaier and Maloney also state, that it is important to improve parenting post-divorce by enhancing interpersonal and emotional connections in a parent-child relationship By doing this, the child will maintain a positive relationship with both parents and better cope with feelings associated with divorce and be able to connect emotionally with both of the parents.

Mixing all of this research together will help parents understand what their child may be feeling and help them make the changes they need in order to provide and focus on their child.

If the parents realize these factors and take the steps to change it, the child involved will eventually be able to overcome the fact that their parents got divorced and be able to move on and enjoy life with each of the parents and maintain a strong, open relationship with each of them. This final idea also helps support the claim of this paper. By having parents going through a divorce use the many different strategies proven to work in this essay, they can take the steps needed to help their child cope and understand that the divorce is not their fault.

Also, they can learn ways to bond and make a strong relationship with their child. In addition, the parents can better understand themselves and change their ways in order to better provide for the child. After reading all of this, one might be able to argue that every divorce is different and every child is different. No child wants to have to go through the pain of their parents getting a divorce, even if it is for the best.

In our society today, it seems like one cannot turn on the television or radio without hearing about gang activity, drugs, or other crimes. Sure most of them are adults, but some are also teenagers. If parents involved in a divorce can take a stand and make the change and understand their child and help their child cope and make that strong parent-child relationship, the children in our society might have a better outlook and perspective on life and the world. They might even want to continue what their parents did for them and make a career out of it or just help kids who need that one person to talk to who understands how they feel.

All it takes is understanding and change, and if society can recognize that and understand what this essay has argued, the children involved in divorce today might grow up and make a change in the world. It all begins with not one, but both parents making the change for the sake of their child. Altmaier, Elizabeth, and Raelynn Maloney. Brown , Joseph H.


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